Flashbacks & the Mysterious Underground Blogosphere

One of my “Angel Williams” avatars. If anyone knows where the original art is, I’d love to know! I can’t find it anymore.

Exactly two years ago today, on February 28, 2012, I started an anonymous blog called Healing at Heaven’s Fountain under the pen name, “Angel Williams.” I had happened upon sort of an underground faith-based anti-porn movement. I was elated when I learned that as an in-cognito wife of a porn addict I was not alone as I had always assumed!  In fact, I discovered dozens of wives who were involved in the addiction recovery  ‘blogoshpere,’ and I was eager to join them. So often, no one around me understood what I was going through. But these women did. They are an amazing bunch, oozing with strength, kindness, humor, compassion, and candor. And now I know there aren’t just dozens. There are literally hundreds. Probably thousands.

It’s not just wives that are blogging though. Men and women, addicts and loved ones, all blog in the addiction recovery realm. They often do so anonymously, as I’ve done for the past two years. They remain faceless and nameless in order protect themselves and their families while speaking openly about intensely difficult circumstances. If you are interested in getting involved, contact me and I’ll hook you up. 😉

At the time I started Heaven’s Fountain, I was terrified. I was in the middle of a divorce, struggling to grasp what had become of my 10-year marriage, living for my two little boys because that’s all I knew how to do, and floundering for an identity.

What a journey it has been so far! And it has only just begun!

Some of you knew me as Angel. If so, you already know my story. For most of my readers, though, MamaCrossroads sprang out of nowhere in January 2014.

Now I’m in an interesting situation. I’d like to bring my story (and my posts) with me, but I’ve sort of abandoned my old space. In short, my privacy at Heaven’s Fountain was compromised, so I figured, “What’s the point?” Plus, I believe that although there is a great need for my style of bluntness in the Christian community, there is also a need  in the mainstream, beyond the faith-based bubble. So I live here now, at Crossroads, where I can reach out to both realms. Bold. Unfettered. Authentic. And I love it.

Since not everything I’ve posted in the past two years will be riveting to my current audience, I’m just going to post the highlights of my story. I’ve already back-posted a few, but I feel like they’re just getting lost somewhere out there in ‘blog land,’ so from this point forward, I’m going to post them as a series of “Flashbacks” so you know what’s ‘new.’ Cool?Or confusing? Anyway … It will make sense as we go along.

Here’s my story so far. I’ll add new posts to the list as we go along:

February 28, 2012 – We flew away

February 29, 2012 – Brave

March 9, 2012 – My move

March 15, 2012 – Boxes

April 16, 2012 – Lost in the city

April 25, 2012 – Baby Steps

April 28, 2012 – A spoonful of sugar

July 4, 2012 – Drowning

July 6, 2012 – Dancing in the rain

July 22, 2012 – Starting to remember

July 24, 2012 – News!

July 25, 2012 – Bare

August 24, 2012 – Back in the mix

October 24, 2012 – Grounded in paradise

January 11, 2013 – Rebound vs. slam dunk

February 4, 2013 – Beautiful words and black sludge

February 8, 2013 – Why I’m not afraid …

July 14, 2013 – I married him


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